OTTAWA – Scratching their heads and stating that it’s on the tip of their tongues, everyone in the nation outside of Manitoba was completely at a loss when asked to name a city in the provi…
Tag: Justin Tudeau
Editorial: How am I supposed to pass the Bechdel test when my husband is so hot?
By Sophie Gregoire Trudeau While performing my annual International Women’s Day ritual by admiring every crevasse on my husbands body and bragging about it on the internet, I saw for the first ti…
Tories continue to rebrand by removing wicker man ritual from party constitution
OTTAWA – After recently ending their opposition to gay marriage, the Conservative Party of Canada is continuing to rebrand, this time by resolving to no longer burn human captives inside of…
Spooky Harper government opens haunted House of Commons
OTTAWA – Lineups have already begun to form in front of the Parliament buildings after Prime Minister Harper’s midnight announcement that the terrifying haunted House of Commons would…
Ben Mulroney cast in Justin Trudeau biopic
Producers for the upcoming Justin Trudeau biopic “Justin: our hero, our saviour, our next prime minister” have revealed that Ben Mulroney will be taking on the titular role. At a press conference…
Trudeau fetus polling well in focus groups
OTTAWA – Justin Trudeau’s expected third child has polled well among voters according to Nanos Research. Since conception, the Trudeau fetus has been polling well in focus groups especially…
Justin Trudeau admits to trying wine
OTTAWA – Liberal leader Justin Trudeau has continued coming-out to the public regarding his recreational substance use, admitting today that he has tried wine at least once since becoming a…