OTTAWA – All 44 members of the NDP caucus arrived in Parliament this morning wearing neck braces, arm slings, head bandages, and seated in wheelchairs after yesterday’s physical altercation…
Tag: justin trudeau
Generous Trudeau gives each Syrian refugee one free topless pic
OTTAWA – With just over 25,000 Syrian refugees having been allowed into the country, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has enacted an even more generous policy by offering each and every one of…
Trudeau says he is ‘proud to be a feminist arms dealer’
OTTAWA – Earlier today, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau reaffirmed his support for feminism, and for making billions of dollars in the sales of military supplies to despotic regimes, in an ho…
Attawapiskat First Nation receives urgent airdrop of committee reports
ATTAWAPISKAT – Following the declaration of a state of emergency over recent suicide attempts in the remote First Nation settlement, the Canadian government has wasted no time airlifting in…
Tories blast Trudeau for not having offshore shell corporation
OTTAWA – The Conservative Party expressed outrage this morning that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was not one of the many world leaders recently exposed by the Panama Papers as having a pri…
Justin Trudeau slings yoga mat over shoulder, whispers “Namaste” sensually in your ear
OTTAWA — Reports have come in that after toweling off his rippling yoga abs, Justin Trudeau gracefully picked up his eco-friendly mat and set your body ablaze by whispering “Namaste” sensua…
Justin Trudeau misses budget vote while staring at his own reflection
OTTAWA – Justin Trudeau missed a crucial vote on the proposed Liberal budget this morning after the Prime Minister spent too long staring at himself in the bathroom mirror again. “I apologi…
A message from the Beaverton’s new editor-in-chief, Ezra Levant
BY: EZRA LEVANT Dear fellow Canadian patriots, I am truly happy to finally be employed again. Getting appointed to editor-in-chief of a trusted news source sure beats the heck out of living in yo…
Tories slam Liberal budget’s reckless acknowledgement of First Nations, veterans
OTTAWA – Conservative Party leaders had harsh words for the federal budget tabled by Finance Minister Bill Morneau yesterday, blasting the Liberal government for its “irresponsible” acknowledgeme…
Trudeau edges budget halfway off table to demonstrate it balancing itself
OTTAWA – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has silenced critics by carefully placing the Liberal government’s budget halfway off of a table, where according to sources it teetered precariously …
