WINNIPEG – With Jason Kenney resigning, another victim has fallen to the might of the Maclean’s Resistance Cover curse. “I knew when Andrew and Brian went down that the rest of …
Tag: Featured Post
Quebec man who supported banning hijabs thinks vaccine passports are a violation of his personal freedom
MONTREAL – Local man Michelle Savard, who thinks Bill 21 did not go far enough to prevent Muslim women and other religious minorities from dressing how they choose, believes that the recent…
Olympic dressage horses sent home in disgrace for ignoring sex ban
TOKYO – Scandal has rocked the Olympics as dressage horses Bella Rose and Dream Boy were caught violating the ban on sex between athletes. “COVID forced us to re-evaluate our normally permissive …
Vancouver offers Stanley Park coyotes one jogger a year as tribute
VANCOUVER – Acknowledging the failure of typical animal control measures to quell a spate of violent coyote attacks over the last few months in Stanley Park, the City of Vancouver has decid…
Delta variant excited to vote for Maxime Bernier
North Bay, ON – While making a pre-election tour in communities as far away from non-white Canadians as possible, Maxime Bernier gained an early endorsement when the Covid Delta variant exp…
Generations of selective breeding produce this fucking asshole
News in Photos…
Meet the unvaccinated: This 33 year old mom is a real fucking idiot
With about 10% of the population saying they will not get vaccinated against the deadly COVID-19 virus, we here at The Beaverton have decided to follow every other media outlet in Canada and do o…
Arthur series to end with fan requested “Death of DW” episode
Eldwood City, Pennsylvania – After 25 seasons, the animated children’s series Arthur is finally coming to an end with an ending producers insist “fans will love.” “After 25 seasons, we’ve d…
NHL’s plan to become league that only caters to MRAs, alt-right trolls and creepy uncles going great
TORONTO – The NHL is reporting progress in their plan to drive away all but their most disturbed and depraved fans by choosing to support sexual offenders and violent, racist trolls. “…
Quiz: Are you living on the beach that makes you old or have you just not slept in a couple days?
M. Night Shyamalan is back with a new thriller that blurs the line between fiction and reality as we, the audience, start to question whether we are living on some sort of plain that makes one ag…
