HEAVEN ― A recent survey of over 10 million residents of Christian Heaven has revealed that a large majority become “somewhat” or “very” unhappy during their first millennium. “Once you’ve finish…
Tag: Bored
Disinterested cat leaves gift card for dead mouse in owners shoes
VANCOUVER – In a stark display of feline frigidity, local cat owner Carly Munroe awoke Thursday morning to find a gift card for a dead mouse inside her slippers left by her cat, Mittens. Ea…
Local man exhausted after spending whole day accomplishing nothing
CAMPBELLTON, NB – When Local man Jared Thursby’s head hit the pillow last night, it was with the weary satisfaction of a day well spent accomplishing absolutely nothing. Thursby, recently l…
Bored shark eats terrible surfer just because he’s there
Tofino, BC – Continuing a weekend-long binge, a local shark bored-ate a terrible surfer Monday morning. “I wasn’t hungry, to be honest,” the shark said as he bit open a bottle of pepto bism…