OTTAWA – With the NDP leadership race revving up, party members are enthusiastic about finding a leader popular enough to divide progressive voters straight down the middle. “I’ve been dreaming o…
Tag: Andrew Scheer
Andrew Scheer refuses to remove Lynn Beyak from caucus until she says something he doesn’t secretly agree with
OTTAWA – Under pressure to remove controversial Senator Lynn Beyak from the Conservative Caucus, leader of the opposition Andrew Scheer has promised to do so the second Beyak says something…
Andrew Scheer distances himself from The Rebel, will go ahead with op-ed in Eugenics Quarterly
OTTAWA – Following the website’s involvement in the Charlottesville neo-Nazi rally, Conservative party leader Andrew Scheer has decided to cut ties with The Rebel, planning instead to publi…
“I didn’t touch the brownies you left on the counter, Mommy,” claims chocolate-covered Andrew Scheer
REGINA, SK – Despite chocolate smeared all over his face and hands, federal Conservative Party Leader Andrew Scheer insists he has no idea what happened to the freshly baked brownies his mo…
Justin Trudeau graces Rolling Stone cover to shore up American base
NEW YORK – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has made the cover of Rolling Stone’s August issue in his latest attempt to appeal to his most supportive constituents; American liberals who don’t …
Tories offer Omar Khadr additional $10.5 million to stay in news until next election
OTTAWA – The Conservative Party has vowed to match Omar Khadr’s $10.5 million payout if he agrees to do “everything in his power” to remain in the news until the next federal election in 2019. “W…
Justin Trudeau suffers third degree burns from failed attempt to jump over campfire
OTTAWA, ON – Canadians coast to coast had their collective gnar severely harshed today, upon learning that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau suffered third degree burns after a failed attempt t…
Khadr apology, payout is an insult to all the Canadian vets who fought for our right to torture imprisoned children
By: Andrew Scheer, Leader of the Official Opposition Today, I was outraged to hear that the Trudeau government has agreed to pay $10.5 million and issue an apology to admitted terrorist Omar Khad…
Andrew Scheer pepper sprayed while trying to photobomb wedding
OTTAWA – Mere moments after a mischievous smile spread across his face at the sight of a young couple taking wedding photos, a shirtless Andrew Scheer is rolling on the ground, grovelling a…
Andrew Scheer promises to lead Tories to majority in 1974 election
OTTAWA – Newly elected Leader of the Opposition Andrew Scheer has promised his fellow Conservatives that his agenda and policies will successfully allow them to form a government after the …
