Tom Hiddleston releases sad break-up song about Taylor Swift
LOS ANGELES — Coming off his recent split with Taylor Swift, Hollywood actor Tom Hiddleston has penned a soulful ballad about the pain he has experienced since the end of the relationship. …
Local couple get sneak peek of their new favourite TV show, The Beaverton
TORONTO – Local couple Tina and William were able to spend their evening watching a live recording of the new Beaverton TV show, the very important televised adaptation of the very importan…
University hazing: first year English Literature students forced to read Milton out loud
KINGSTON – Queen’s University administration is currently investigating a hazing incident involving first year English literature students who were forced to read Books IV to IX of Milton’s…
Opposing football players discover they’ve been praying to same god
EAST RUTHERFORD – Minutes before kickoff of an NFL game, New York Jets cornerback Derrelle Revis and Dallas Cowboys tight end Jason Witten overheard each other praying to the same god for v…
Mansbridge retirement leaves nation’s mothers with precious few remaining sexual fantasies
TORONTO – Peter Mansbridge’s announcement that he will be retiring in July 2017 have left the middle-aged mothers of Canada with even fewer celebrities about which to sexually fantasize. “H…
Drake finally gets under the shirt, over the bra with Rihanna
TORONTO — Over the long weekend, the nation was jubilant to receive news that Toronto-born rapper Drake had finally gotten to second base with girlfriend Rihanna. The news about the progres…
Ontario government successfully prepares generation of children who don’t know if $300 billion debt big or small
TORONTO – The emergence of EQAO test results that show half of grade 6 students failing to meet the provincial math standard has prompted the Ontario government to reveal their plan to rais…
Nation’s teachers desperately try to finish lesson plans night before school starts
OTTAWA – Having failed to realize the first day of class was coming up so quickly, Canada’s teachers spent last night desperately trying to finish their lesson plans and assignment schedule…
You are Drake: Can you record a #1 Single and watch this guy’s stuff for a few minutes?
Drake, successful Toronto hip-hop artist, has forgotten that he has to write a hit song to record… tomorrow… Also, can you hold onto this guy’s stuff?…
How well do you really know Prime Minister Justin Trudeau?
How well do you really know Canadian Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau? Well, take this quiz to find out the conclusive answer! Sources https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Justin_Trudeau http://time.com/4…
