HEAVEN – Hesitant and embarrassed, God, the almighty Lord, creator of Earth and the heavens, approached recently deceased sex educator Sue Johanson with a question. “Hey, I’m, a…
National
PPC struggle to adapt to Poilievre’s popularity with their base: men who keep a list of every woman that’s rejected them
OTTAWA – The People’s Party Of Canada are struggling to adapt to Pierre Poilievre’s ascension to Conservative Party leader given his popularity with the men who make up the part…
Pierre Poilievre vows to hold Trudeau accountable for Taylor Swift leaving Canada out of tour dates
OTTAWA – After Canadians were left devastated yesterday to learn that Taylor Swift’s massively anticipated Eras international tour wouldn’t be making any stops in Canada, Conservative leade…
Trudeau announces he will ban inflation
OTTAWA – In a bold legislative move to combat the ongoing rise in inflation, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced he plans to declare the unavoidable byproduct of the modern monetary…
Canada hits 40 million people, 40 available houses
OTTAWA – The federal government has announced that Canada has hit a major landmark, as a 40th house came onto the market just as the national population reached 40 million. “When Canada was found…
Trudeau announces that David Johnston to be replaced by Xi Jinping
OTTAWA – Amid backlash against the appointment of former Governor General David Johnston as special rapporteur on foreign election interference which resulted in his resignation, Prime Minister T…
Canadians celebrate summer with nationwide campfire
OTTAWA – In a stirring example of national togetherness, Canadians from all walks of life are planning to come together in the summer of 2023 to enjoy a massive nationwide campfire ranging from t…
How to protect yourself from the pollutants in wildfire smoke
Smoke from fires in Ontario, Quebec and Alberta has made their way into cities, where residents are reporting a campfire smell and hazy quality to the atmosphere. Unfortunately this haze carries …
7 facts about Pierre Poilievre that probably aren’t true but we refused to be briefed on the actual situation
Even though Pierre Poilievre has been leader of the opposition for a while now there is still so much we don’t know about him. And we were outraged to discover these 7 almost certainly not …
Canadians explain why they’re mad about the new Passport design
The government has unveiled a new design to Canada’s passport. Out went images of Terry Fox and Vimy Ridge, something we definitely all knew were in our passports, and in went more abstract…
