OTTAWA – Finishing out the last of his holiday shopping, former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has reportedly asked aides how many autographed 8×10 photographs of himself to gift to his…
Holidays
Worse than a Disney Adult? Childless woman attends Santa Claus parade
Jarvis, ON — In a move experts are calling “genuinely unhinged,” a childless woman was spotted attending the Jarvis Santa Claus Parade entirely of her own volition, raising questions …
Supreme Court of Canada to donate robes to mall Santas in need
OTTAWA – The Supreme Court of Canada has announced it will donate its recently decommissioned crimson fur robes to mall Santas in need. The iconic red and white robes were officially replaced ear…
Air Transat strike averted, reads man who now has to fly home for holidays
CALGARY – Air Transat has reached a tentative deal with its pilot union, narrowly avoiding a strike on the cusp of the busy holiday travel period, meaning that Francois Tremblay, 32, will i…
Ethical store only overworks employees without anyone to spend holidays with
SMITHS FALLS, ON ― In an attempt to assuage customers’ consciences and boost last-minute Christmas Eve sales, local handmade clothing store, The Silver Thread, has announced that they will not fo…
Pornhub to drop F from MILF in observance of Mother’s Day
Montreal, Quebec, Canada- The Canadian owned internet pornography video-sharing website Pornhub has announced that, in honour of Mother’s Day, it will be removing the word “Fuck” From its MILF t…
High cost of eggs force children to decorate Easter tofu blocks
CINCINNATI, OH – When single father Michael Field’s children, Talia and Connor, ran to their kitchen table last Sunday to decorate eggs for Easter, they were confused to find instead a bowl…
Thoughtful gift thwarted by Dollarama price tag
OAKVILLE – Kevin Walker’ seemingly thoughtful gesture for his girlfriend’s birthday on Sunday was obliterated when she noticed her gift was purchased from the discount chain, Do…
5 ways to eroticise Groundhog Day because you’re busy on Valentine’s
The most romantic day of the year is almost here, but what if you’re busy this Valentine’s Day? Don’t start preparing for divorce court just yet; with a little planning and the right attitude, Gr…
News Anchor excited for annual holiday tradition of paying lip service to Hannukah
VANCOUVER – Local TV news anchor Mitch Huggins was shaking with anticipation Tuesday as local news affiliate WKQC-8 prepared for its yearly tradition of modestly recognizing the existence of Hann…
