ANN ARBOR – In a move that has stunned the fast food industry, Domino’s Pizza has unveiled a new delivery policy for its customers: Your pizza delivered in 30 minutes or it’s probably not coming …
Business
Starbucks marks Remembrance Day by remembering Christmas is seven weeks away
CLARINGTON, ON — Starbucks locations from across Canada are marking November 11th by festively reminding customers that the Holidays are only a mere seven weeks away. “We are honouring our …
Bombardier develops new jet capable of breaking government bailout barrier
MIRABEL — In an effort the revolutionize the Canadian aerospace industry, Bombardier Inc. has been tirelessly working to break the taxpayer investment barrier with a newer version of the CS…
KFC introduces bucket of chicken skins
LOUISVILLE – With a bold ad campaign featuring the slogan “Who are we even kidding anymore?” KFC introduced its new “Bucket of Skins” earlier this month, and it has instantly become an all-…
Mountain Dew to ‘Kickstart’ the home births of 17 lucky winners
TORONTO – In celebration of the launch of the new ‘Baby Pink Anarchy’ flavoured Mountain Dew Kickstart, 17 lucky winners are having their home births sponsored by Mountain Dew. “Our brand i…
China now outperforming U.S. at economic meltdowns
BEIJING – Following decades of surpassing the United States in education, manufacturing, and international trade, China is now outperforming its American rivals at economic meltdowns. “It’s super…
RBC unveils new savings account to pay for banking fees
TORONTO — Canada’s largest, most profitable bank announced today customers can now open a high interest savings account solely reserved for paying the bank’s lavish charges and fees. “RBC w…
87% of Nation’s receptionists agree: Mr. Johannsen not available at the moment
WINNIPEG – A recent country-wide survey of the nation’s receptionists has revealed that 87% of them agree that Mr. Johannson, Vice President of Marketing and Analytics, is not available at …
Airlines announce disruptive children to be checked into cargo
TORONTO – Airline passengers easily annoyed by rambunctious children are sighing in relief after numerous Canadian airlines announced they will now require all disruptive children to be che…
New edition of Slip ‘N Slide comes with built-in rocks
EMERYVILLE, CA – A classic summer toy for children, the Slip ‘N Slide is getting a 21st-century makeover, with the new design featuring built-in chunks of stuff that hurts the human body. “…
