1. What’s your favourite colour? a) Violet b) Fire Engine Red c) Hawthorne Yellow d) Sky Blue 2. Are you a cat person or a dog person? a) Cat b) Dog 3. Where is your summer home? a) Muskoka b) Th…
Feeling dead on the inside now a requirement for federal government jobs
OTTAWA – All federal departments and Crown Corporations will now have an added job requirement: feeling completely empty, hopeless and void of human emotion. Treasury Board President Tony C…
QUIZ: What Does Your Personal Information Say About You?
Sponsored quiz by: Authenic Quiz Corpp 1. What is your credit card number? A) 4530 1500 8503 0048 B) 4568 9304 1198 2283 C) 8492 9204 2748 2203 2. What’s your favourite password? A) My moth…
Nation waits for more Bill Cosbys to come forward before believing Bill Cosby rape accusations
HOLLYWOOD – Following the release of documents revealing that Bill Cosby himself admitted to obtaining prescription Quaaludes to have sex with women, a skeptical nation has resolved to give…
Michael Chan accused of holding office while being non-white
TORONTO – Earlier this week CSIS accused Michael Chan, the Ontario Minister of Citizenship, Immigration and International Trade, of holding office while not being white. “Sure, when we made…
Struggling used book store tries its hand at happy endings
MONTREAL – Used bookshop The Blot & Feather has attracted a swell in once dwindling customers with a novel solution; to exclusively offer happy endings with every purchase. Owner Bernar…
New generation of e-cigarettes will provide authentic cancer experience
CANADA – In a recent breakthrough by electronic cigarette manufacturers the next generation of e-cigarettes on the market will cause cancer and other complications, giving what distributors…
OPP investigating RCMP probing Senators reviewing RCMP scrutinizing OPP union
OTTAWA – The Ontario Provincial Police’s report on the RCMP’s response to the Parliamentary shootings last October may be overshadowed by the RCMP investigating the same Senators who will s…
All new mom wants for Mother’s Day is an IUD
TORONTO – New mother Megan Hill knows what she wants from her babies this mother’s day, and that’s the promise she will never have another baby ever again. “When I got pregnant with our twins Vio…
