OTTAWA – With Conservative Premiers now freely using S. 33 to overrule any court ruling getting in the way of their agenda the federal government has announced plans to rename The Charter Of Rights & Freedoms to The Charter Of Long-Term Goals & General Guidelines
“Now that the landmark Charter we have been celebrating and teaching students about for 30 years is basically a napkin with the words ‘please don’t’ written on it this seemed like the most appropriate course of action,” said Justice Minister Arif Virani.
“At least this way people won’t get their hopes up that they still have rights that can’t be taken away at a moment’s notice.”
Along with the name change certain small additions will be made to the text of The Charter. For example S. 15 will now read “It would be great if every individual were equal under the law, and we sure hope no one discriminates based on race, gender or sexual orientation, but what are you gonna do huh?”
“We look forward to rolling out The Charter Of Long-Term Goals and General Guidelines this fall, and we think law school students are going to have a lot of fun debating whether S. 7’s protections of life, liberty and security of the person is a goal or a guideline,” added Virani.
In related news defenders of the use of S. 33 have pointed out that its use to prevent Trans kids from changing names without parental consent or to stop public servants from wearing religious symbols are popular with the public, because there has never been an example of truly heinous human rights violations that were popular with the public at the time.
