Conservatives explain why we need private healthcare

As more Conservative lead provinces move towards a two tier healthcare system despite Universal Healthcare being extremely popular with Canadians, we asked some politicians why the move was necessary. Here is what they said:

"I don't know if you've ever been to a fancy wedding, but a two-tiered cake is way better than a single-tier cake. I assume the same principle applies to people trying to see a doctor."
"We simply do not have the means to continue spending some but not all of the money the feds give us to maintain the public healthcare system at above average quality."
"You know how expensive it is to fly first class to the U.S. for medical treatment these days?!"
"If we all go see the same doctors then there is a risk the wealthy could get infected by poor person germs."
"It was either hospitals or the fire department. Something was getting fucking privatized."
"We wanted to give doctors and nurses more opportunities to over-work so much they make deadly mistakes."
"Canadians deserve the best healthcare their money can buy, and the just above terrible healthcare their collective tax money can buy after we spend most of it on police budgets."

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