LONDON, ON – In an explosively damning report published by the University of Western Ontario, researchers found that the temperature outside “never right.”
Though the report was expected to delve into the myriad of ways climate change affects temperature to produce hostile environments, the report instead examined the nuances of “it sometime too hot, even though it mostly too cold.”
“It doesn’t feel good,” the 8 person research team observed. “It rain, there wind, don’t get us started on humidity. Always need different special clothes to go outside, but even then, still not right.”
Another excerpt posited, “Why not temperature outside body match the way body feel? Why? Something just not right about it.”
While the report only examined the ways in which the temperature outside “never just right,” one of Western’s partner schools, the University of Nairobi, has published a study about how “inside temperature not that great either.”
Both reports concluded that, “Everything about it feel bad all the time.”
