OTTAWA – Pledging to restart the office appliance economy, the federal government is investing in over $100 million in toner cartridges for its many redacted information requests.
The government was candid about the lack of preparation when providing the press and the public with timely non-information.
“We were not adequately prepared for the WE scandal,” explained Procurement Minister Anita Anand. “Public servants and their photocopiers were exhausted from covering up revealing details. Some were forced to commandeer several printers at a local Staples to meet the demand.”
Whether it’s the House of Commons covering up information on WE charity connections to the Liberal government or the Defence Department covering up information on a child molester, government officials insist printers will be busy removing information 24/7.
“Our government is committed to creating an emergency stockpile of cartridges and black markers so this lack of transparency continues to happen,” said Anand. “Plus, a $5 ATIP now comes with at least $10 worth of ink on it, which is a great deal.”
At press time, documents containing details of the $100 million toner contract were redacted due privacy concerns.
