Oh no! Kawhi Leonard is now King of the North and he has no idea how to give legislation Royal Assent! - The Beaverton
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Oh no! Kawhi Leonard is now King of the North and he has no idea how to give legislation Royal Assent!

Now that Kawhi Leonard has been crowned King of the North and has replaced the Queen as our Sovereign, he’s got no clue on how to issue a Royal Assent, appoint a Prime Minister or proroguing Parliament.

And, OMG, the MVP hasn’t even heard about Canadian constitutional norms or his responsibility to read a Speech from the Throne. What was the NBA thinking when they granted him as the figurehead to all of the country’s supreme power and authority?

Unbelievable.

But don’t worry King Kawhi, ’s not that hard and we Canadians have you covered. Allow us to use some terms from the basketball court to explain how you will rule us, your loyal subjects.

  • Dunk legislation that has been passed by both the House of Commons and Senate
  • Huddle with the Prime Minister like he’s your coach, and remember, it’s wise to follow his advice on play changes and cabinet appointments
  • No one is directly elected Prime Minister; it’s based on having the confidence of the House of Commons, just like your confidence at nailing those three-pointers
  • You may have to sleigh a dragon…no, just joking, we don’t have those here

We look forward to working with you, Your Royal Highness!

God Save The King of The North!