TORONTO – Unveiling their new plan for how recreational weed will be consumed moving forward the Ontario Liberals have announced that all would be smokers will need to gather at a single basement apartment in Sudbury Ontario.
“In order to keep recreational marijuana safe and away from children, we have determined this is the best course of action,” said Premier Wynne at the press conference. “Also Sudbury is lovely this time of year.”
The full details of the plan state that anyone who wants to consume even a single puff of a joint must make the trek to the Northern Ontario town, locate the basement without assistance from any locals, and then provide the basement security with a password which changes every hour.
“In addition you must make sure to bring three bushels of potatoes, a cornish hen and a nice pie to leave as tribute to the government. Apple would be nice,” added Wynne.
Critics have claimed that the requirements are overly burdensome and that a single basement would undoubtedly become quite crowded if the thousands of Ontarians who enjoy marijuana are forced to use it at once.
“I can’t imagine the bathroom situation is going to be very good,” said Toronto man Kurt Miller. “Also I don’t really want to drive to Sudbury every time I need to unwind from a stressful day at work.”
At press time the entire province had agreed to just ignore the rules and continue doing things the way they had been for years.
