OTTAWA – After a federal judge upheld the government’s right to indefinitely detain immigrants as it sees fit, Trudeau sent a triumphant humanitarian tweet, inviting refugees from all over the world to seek asylum in Canada’s prisons.
“To those fleeing persecution terror & war, we will welcome you to our maximum security facilities, regardless of your faith,” read the tweet, which has been retweeted over a hundred thousand times since this morning. “#WelcomeToCanada”
The ruling allows the Immigration and Refugee Board, most of whom have no legal training, to continue its practice of jailing migrants, of all nations, colours, and creeds, in any prison they desire. This allows refugees, 6,596 in 2015-16, the opportunity to meet some of Canada’s most impressive and violent criminals while the IRB spends the next 6 months to 10 years looking over their case.
“Even the United States can only detain refugees for 6 months before being required to release them,” said Immigration Minister Ahmed Hussen. “I guess they just don’t care as much about diversity in their prison populations. Another reason why Canada is hashtag amazing.”
Canada has faced criticism for its system, with the UN Human Rights Commision begging the country to impose some sort of limit as recently as 2015, but government sources say they’re just jealous of how much praise Canada is getting.
“We accept people of all colours, but these people certainly seem like they might be a little too green with envy,” said Hussen. “Not every nation is progressive enough to put the power of indefinite detention in the hands of civil servants who have zero oversight.”
At press time, Trudeau had tweeted his support of indefinite detention as the solution to the immigrant and refugee housing issue.
