LONDON – Western University student Arash Adari was forced to engage in brief but intensive deliberation yesterday afternoon on how to proceed after spotting his completely naked psychology professor in the gym locker room.
“I was just going to go in for some quick cardio, but this totally caught me off-guard,” said Adari, referring to Professor Girardi’s bare, semi-geriatric body. “I had to think quick.”
Although Adari admitted that his encounter with Girardi showed him that some people are just comfortable with their bodies, this thought gave little comfort to Adari, who was burdened with the difficult choice between abandoning social convention and being a closer witness to Girardi’s multiple penile angiomas.
“It’s like, if I don’t say hi and he sees me, he might find that weird, since we sorta know each other” said Adari. “On the other hand, tilting your head higher than usual for the entire conversation to avoid seeing something that might stay with you forever is kinda weird too.”
Adari says he weighed many factors – including Girardi’s age, verbosity, and how much of his testicles he’d have to see – in order to make a final decision on what to do. In the end, Adari opted to avoid interaction by turning his head ninety degrees, quickening his pace, and pretending to be on the phone in case Girardi tried to flag him down.
“It’s just… it’s easier this way,” said Adari. “For the both of us.”
At press time, Girardi was wondering why Arash was acting so funny.
