TORONTO – Ontario government officials are appealing to grade 10 students to help them fix the problems with online Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test since it crashed earlier today.
Panicked civil servants at the Education, Quality, and Accountability Office, who have never been educated in how computers or the internet works, pleaded with some of the 190,000 students who were unable to take the test due to unknown technical error.
“I know all of you kids are much better with computers than we are,” said one EQAO proctor to a class of grade 10s at Holy Cross High School who were staring at a frozen screen. “I’ve tried rebooting and that’s really all I know about these boxes and screens. It’s up to you, kids.”
“I typed the problem into the Google; why isn’t this working?” asked a flustered EQAO official to 15-year-old Malik Williams of Leaside High School in East York. “Is it the wifi? Did we overload the internet? Don’t use that Firefox thing; it’s probably a virus.”
According to sources, the problem was easily fixed by several students after being promised that they wouldn’t have to take the literacy test to graduate.
