SILICON VALLEY – In what has been hailed as a major breakthrough in the hyper-competitive world of nanotechnology, tech giant PikoTekk Industries has unveiled the world’s smallest ever severance package.
“Here at PikoTekk, we’re always asking the big questions about how to make things smaller,” said PikoTekk CEO Melvin ‘Pep’ Bergström in a livecast this Monday. “And where others see an essential part of fair workplace compensation, we see an opportunity.”
Commentators have praised the new package as ‘revolutionary’, ‘unbelievably small’, and ‘some sort of practical joke, right boss?’.
The package, scheduled for release in the third quarter of this year, is expected to give PikoTekk the definitive edge over their competitors. However, rival tech giant Femtonomix is rumoured to be developing a ‘cloud-based’ independent-contractor employment model that would make severance packages obsolete.
At press time, PikotTekk also claimed to have the smallest children assembling their devices of any company in the industry.
