TORONTO – The struggle to market breast cancer corporate awareness is one step closer to victory after the Foundation for Breast Cancer Research of Canada has made a breakthrough in business and logo research.
“After many years of effort, our organization can now beat these malignant marketing problems,” said Jillian Roy, Head of Public Relations at the Foundation. “We have developed groundbreaking consumer screening methods that can predict consumer trends before they fully develop.”
“This new methodology is so effective that we can recoup all our marketing costs and pay for the occasional scientific research.”
The companies that sponsor the charity are proud that their contribution to breast cancer marketing is now prominently displayed on their promotional products. Roy explained that donning feminine coloured ribbons, shirts, bracelets, headbands, pom-poms, sports jerseys, keychains, capes and football gloves “will create a culture of breast cancer corporate awareness.”
“We’re really upbeat about this research progress” said Andy St. Louis, CEO of a toilet paper manufacturer whose products now have rose-coloured ribbons printed on them. “When people reach for our product, they will be reassured that we support breast cancer enterprising.”
“Just look at these amazing salmon-coloured purses and salmon-coloured cell phone cases!” Roy exclaimed with ecstasy. “People are going to love it! It’s products like these that give people hope that one day we’ll beat this thing.”
