AUSTIN, TX – Disgraced cycling icon Lance Armstrong apologized today to cancer, the broad group of diseases involving unregulated cell growth that affects tens of millions of people around the world.
Armstrong visited the University Medical Center Brackenridge to speak with a number of tissue samples.
“He had a private conversation with a variety of growths and tumours in which he expressed heartfelt regret and sincere apology over any stress and negative media attention they’ve suffered due to their association with Lance,” said a cancer spokesperson Kathy Dufferin.
In October of 2012, Armstrong, himself a cancer survivor, had his career’s legacy erased and was banned from cycling forever by the International Cycling Union. This came from revelations in a report by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency that he took part in “the most sophisticated, professionalized and successful doping program that sport has ever seen.” This caused all cancers, from commonly diagnosed melanomas to rarer types such as Merkel Cell Carcinoma to be unfairly associated with deceit, dishonour, and the illegal use of human growth hormone and blood doping in competitive cycling contests.
Many in the medical community have pointed out the negative image Armstrong’s doping scandal has also cast on those struggling with the disease.
“Let’s not forget about the patients,” commented oncologist Joel Aguilar. “A couple of months ago I diagnosed a man with testicular cancer, and he honestly said to me ‘Oh great, just like that fucking cheater Lance Armstrong.’”
Added Aguilar: “I really hope the American Cancer Society will push to have Armstrong stripped of his survivor status.”
