MOSCOW – As a mustered force of 100,000 Russian soldiers stands by at the Ukrainian border, Russian President Vladimir Putin was reportedly spotted at his Novo-Ogaryevo residence debating t…
Tag: Russia
Russian opposition leader Navalny will get fair trial, says head judge Vladimir Rutin
MOSCOW – Following the arrest of frequent Vladimir Putin critic Alexei Navalny, skeptics have been assured that the upcoming trial will be fair and impartial, according to newly-appointed h…
Eric Trump still in line at Apple Store to vote
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Eyewitnesses report President Trump’s son is still in line at the Georgetown Apple Store, waiting to cast his vote in the 2020 Presidential Election which stopped accepti…
“Trump is finished” declares man who thought Trump couldn’t win in 2016
VANCOUVER – After a detailed analysis of the latest polls and several visits to fivethirtyeight.com Martin Kilroy has announced his conclusion that Trump will definitely lose the 2020 elect…
Kremlin still can’t remember trigger word to activate Bernie Sanders
MOSCOW – A source inside the Kremlin has confirmed that the handlers of deep cover operative Bernie Sanders have lost the password needed to activate the commands placed in his subconscious…
Nation relieved to know US fixed and everything going back to normal now
AMERICA — Across the country, individuals are reporting tremendous relief that after the election of President Donald Trump in 2016 and his subsequent years in office, things are finally go…
Democrats plan even more strongly-worded letter asking Trump to follow the rules please
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In the wake of Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s press conference leaving impeachment up to Congress, House Democrats have announced they will instead send President Trump…
Local man says father “dumb enough” to fall for history’s largest, most sophisticated propaganda network
LANSING, SOUTH DAKOTA — 25 year old business administrator Jayson Milnerd has once again expressed astonishment that his Trump-supporting father is “so ignorant” as to fall for a multibilli…
Mueller attaches literal smoking gun to report just to keep those fuckers happy
Washington D.C.— Special Prosecutor Robert Mueller has reportedly taken the unprecedented step of appending a recently used Colt 45 to his special report to U.S. Attorney General William Barr in …
Totally Retro! US kicks it old school with dangerous arms race against Russia
It’s like, time to get totally radical because the United States government is returning to the 80’s with neon colours, Duran Duran and no treaties to prevent nuclear war. The whole thing started…