VANCOUVER – During a contentious meeting Vancouver city council decided by a vote of 7 to 3 to adopt a new revitalization plan that includes blinding poor residents to keep them from seeing…
Tag: Paris
Shocked Trans Mountain pipeline sees Justin Trudeau and environment holding hands in restaurant
OTTAWA – The Trans Mountain pipeline was shocked to discover Justin Trudeau on a date with the environment yesterday evening, after the Prime Minister had just hours earlier told it that he…
Toronto voted best city in the world by people who’ve never been anywhere else
TORONTO – Ontario’s capital has yet again been voted the greatest city in the world by those who’ve never stepped foot outside its borders. “It’s not only the fashion capital of the world, it’s a…
Yukon’s Signpost Forest reminds tourists of other places they could be instead of Signpost Forest
WATSON LAKE, YT — For decades, a tourist attraction along the Alaskan Highway consisting of signs from other places has inspired the imagination of tourists of destinations they would rathe…
Woman sensually undresses all dressed chips
PARIS — Yesterday, seated before a roaring fire in a spacious hotel room, local woman Julie Chambers, slowly and ever so tenderly, undressed a bag of all dressed chips as though for the first tim…
Justin Trudeau demands ISIS reduce greenhouse gas emissions by 20%
PARIS – In an impassioned speech at the Paris Climate Summit on Tuesday, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau issued a public demand that the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) immediately take step…
Swooning world leaders tell Trudeau climate isn’t the only thing that’s hot around here
PARIS — World leaders at the COP21 meeting on climate change have reached a consensus that both the climate and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau are getting hotter and hotter. An amor…
Astronomical Union threatens planetary status of Neptune if funding demands not met
PARIS – In a surprise press conference this morning, International Astronomical Union President Norio Kaifu announced that, unless funding goals were met within the next 24 hours, the body would …
World Leaders march in Paris to defend their exclusive right to suppress journalists
PARIS – Dozens of World Leaders joined yesterday’s Charlie Hebdo solidarity march to send a message to terrorists that intimidation of media will not be tolerated, unless they are the ones doing …
French terrorists disappointed to discover satire doesn’t die
PARIS – With French authorities tracking them down, the gunmen who attacked a satirical news office were disheartened to discover that satire – and all other forms of gags, antics and…