TORONTO – Public health officials in Toronto have confirmed its first 50,000 cases of being a misinformed fuckwit as xenophobic conspiracy theories and tales of false cures continue to spre…
Tag: Featured Article
Rex Murphy parachuted into Australian wildfires to deny climate change
SYDNEY – Postmedia columnist and professional old man Rex Murphy has been parachuted into Australia’s massive forest where support for denying climate change and doing nothing about it has …
Unskilled foreigners seek move to Canada
OTTAWA – A British and American couple, both unemployed, are seeking to emigrate to Canada despite having no real skills to offer the country, early reports indicate. British and American m…
Toronto’s expensive housing market forces Harry and Meghan to consider living in Barrie
BARRIE, ON – Astronomically high housing prices in Toronto have forced Prince Harry and Meghan Markle to consider living in Barrie for their new North American home, unconfirmed reports sug…
TSN camera wins World Juniors gold medal
OSTRAVA, CZ – The TSN centre ice camera has won gold at the IIHF World Juniors in the Czech Republic on behalf of Team Canada. The camera, who played at every game at the arena showed a tre…
Canada’s military advisers unsure if they should be training Iraqi army to fight ISIS, Iran, or US
BAGHDAD – Canadian soldiers deployed on a NATO mission training Iraqi troops are now unsure whether they are preparing Iraq to fight ISIS, Iran, or the United States. The deployment of 250 …
Fabricland files for bankruptcy after biggest customer fired from Coach’s Corner
TORONTO – Canada’s Largest Fashion Fabric Distributor Fabricland says it will be shutting its doors now that its largest customer, Don Cherry, has been fired from by Sportsnet. Over 5…
OC Transpo recommends Ottawa commuters leave for work a week earlier
OTTAWA – Ottawa’s public transit service is advising that area commuters should arrive at any bus or LRT stop a week in advance as a precaution to avoid being late for work. “We are still m…
Party leaders spar over Canada’s only province of Quebec
GATINEAU, QC – Canada’s six party leaders took to the podiums last night to debate the most important issues facing their province in the minority language of English. Making up 100% of the…
Putin impressed Canadian voters don’t need help spreading disinformation
MOSCOW – Russian President Vladimir Putin was impressed at Canadian voters initiative to misinform themselves without the aid of a foreign power. Putin was more than happy not to have lifte…