WASHINGTON D.C. – After almost 250 years of data-gathering, the American experiment has ended in a catastrophic laboratory explosion. “I don’t understand what went wrong!” sighed the facili…
Tag: explosion
Climate change skeptic insists earth was booby-trapped to explode from beginning
OTTAWA—Climate change skeptic Herb Gilpin has found increasing support for his theory that climate change, far from being caused by man-made pollutants, is in fact an indication that it is heatin…
New breed of action hero coolly walks toward explosion
HOLLYWOOD – Tired of the same old action movie trope of the badass protagonist calmly strolling away from an explosion he just caused, film producers are pushing for their heroes to break t…
Panicked uncle handles sleeping baby like old-timey crate of nitroglycerin
Woodstock, NB – Local uncle Grant Newsten, 32, has been reported by witnesses to be handling his newborn niece, Amelia Newsten, as if she is a rickety and highly explosive crate of long-aba…