OTTAWA – Elizabeth May announced yesterday that she will be stepping down as Green Party leader effective immediately so she can finally sink her teeth into a rare t-bone steak. May, who ha…
Tag: Elizabeth May
“See how easy that was?” says May to Scheer after quitting
OTTAWA – Shortly after resigning as leader of the Green Party this morning Elizabeth May called current Conservative leader Andrew Scheer to tell him it wasn’t all that hard. “You don’t hav…
Editorial: I wouldn’t want to be part of a coalition government that would have me anyway
By Andrew Scheer, Leader of the Conservative Party One of my favourite sayings by a young man named Andrew Scheer goes: I don’t care to belong to any coalition government that would have me as a …
Beaverton Election Special to reveal who will secure the crucial Beaverton endorsement
Toronto – Producers of beloved satirical website and international television phenomenon The Beaverton announced today that they would be revealing which party had secured the coveted Beave…
Green Party asks plane they’re flying on to remove left, right wings to adhere to party’s message
MONTREAL – Flights were delayed at Pierre Elliot Trudeau Airport after Green Party Leader Elizabeth May insisted the Air Canada flight she was travelling on remove both left and right wings…
Canadians continue to await release of Conservative climate change plan
OTTAWA – Despite promises they would release it on June 19th, the federal Conservatives appear to be no closer to releasing their detailed plan for addressing climate change. “Frankly I don…
Quick-thinking beachgoers save Elizabeth May trapped in plastic six ring pack
SAANICH, BC – A group of environmental do-gooders saved Green Party Leader and endangered species Elizabeth May who was found tangled in a web of six ring beer packs. “My partner and I were…
Elizabeth May shivs biggest, meanest guy in holding cell
BURNABY, B.C. – Emergency crews have been called to the Burnaby RCMP station amid scattered reports that Green Party leader Elizabeth May has shivved the biggest guy in lock-up following her arre…
Elizabeth May to go as ‘major party leader’ for Halloween
OTTAWA – Green Party leader Elizabeth May has announced that she plans to get into the Halloween spirit by dressing up as a “major party leader” this October 31st. “Halloween is a chance to…
Green Party condemns former candidate for throwing non-organic pumpkin seeds at Trudeau
HAMILTON – Green Party Leader Elizabeth May is condemning a former candidate of her party for throwing non-organic pumpkin seeds at Prime Minister Justin Trudeau earlier today. According to…