‘Tis the season! It’s that faithful time of year where folks all over the country step up to the plate and give their significant others something utterly useless and mismatched to their personal…
Tag: candle
Algorithm scrambles to get woman perfect, last-minute Valentine’s Day gift
TORONTO – A series of preset coded instructions attune to the online habits of Sara Ketema rushed to present a perfect Valentine’s Day gift to its monitored host, though many experts argue …
“Spread cheer at Christmas!” tweets woman who just threw defective holiday candle at 16-year-old cashier
TORONTO – Yesterday afternoon, Sandra Johnson, a mother of three with an active social media presence, tweeted the heart-warming sentiment “Spread cheer at Christmas!” to her followers, just five…
Advancement in field of weighted blankets allows covers to choke you slightly, call you daddy
WATERLOO, ON – At a press conference held last Thursday, weighted blanket startup Consensual Crushing announced its new line of adult bedspreads featuring the ability to choke users while e…
Dark Phoenix Review: You’d think after 13 X-Men films, at least ONE would be about professional candle making, but NO
With the release of its final X-franchise offering, Fox has hammered the final nail into the coffin of a franchise that has refused to accurately depict the time-honoured art of candle making, de…