DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA – In what critics have described as ‘blatant nepotism’, President Trump has empowered son-in-law Jared Kushner to be the person who shaves his back. “Jared …
U.S.
Chelsea Manning released from prison, excited for new career as Twitter abuse victim
UNITED STATES – Private Chelsea Elizabeth Manning, who was released from confinement on May 17th following seven years in a military prison, has expressed enthusiasm that she can now pursue…
Roger Ailes dies secure in knowledge he left the world a more terrible place
PALM BEACH, FL. — As American pundits and politicians continue to process the sudden passing of Roger Ailes, a spokesman for the disgraced former Fox News chairman’s family issued a statement say…
Frustrated Trump demands to know what he has to do to get impeached
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a week that’s seen him publicly admit to obstructing justice, leak highly classified information to Russian ambassadors, and severely compromise American intelligence partne…
Trump fires James Comey, thereby ending any suspicion regarding Russia scandal
WASHINGTON D.C. — President Donald Trump fired FBI Director James Comey late Tuesday, putting to rest any rumours that his administration colluded with Russia to influence the 2016 election…
Hillary Clinton maintains composure during first run-in with America at cafe they used to go to together
WASHINGTON, D.C. – According to sources, Hillary Clinton reportedly came off well during a chance encounter with the United States of America in the cafe they used to frequent together. It …
House GOP excited to finally read new AHCA bill they just passed
WASHINGTON, D.C. — House Republicans told reporters this afternoon that they are excited to actually read the text of the American Health Care Act, which they just voted 217 – 212 to …
Senate Republicans divided on Trump’s plan to kill us all
WASHINGTON, DC – Republicans remained divided Monday, as a vote neared on President Trump’s controversial proposal to kill everyone on earth. The proposed “Liquidation Of All Human Life Act…
Troubled state executed several small animals before moving on to people
ARKANSAS – Consultation of public records has revealed that several executed animals were found in areas near where the state of Arkansas would later go on to kill human beings. “Violence t…
Donald Trump Jr. killed in drive-by revenge shooting by elephants
Mar-A-Lago, FL – Tragedy struck the First Family today, when Donald Trump Jr. died of his injuries shortly after being riddled with bullets by a group of elephants in a Cadillac 4×4. “…
