TORONTO – Facing criticism for insufficient traffic enforcement and an increase in fatalities, the Toronto Police have unveiled a new workshop series for pedestrians, showing them how to die in a…
Toronto
Toronto Zoo running winter time ‘Sad Animals in Cold Cages’ promotion
TORONTO — In an effort to boost attendance during the winter months, the Toronto Zoo is featuring many of their animals from warmer climates in a special ‘Sad Animals in Cold Cages’ campaig…
New Toronto dating app replaces first date with moving in together to save on rent
TORONTO – In a crowded dating-app marketplace that includes Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, and OK Cupid, a new app has emerged that is marketed specifically toward Toronto singles looking to co-hab…
Study: Lining up to exit subway car on wrong side most embarrassing thing a Torontonian can do
TORONTO – A conclusive study by the University of Toronto has found that trying to exit the subway via doors that are not on the same side as the platform is just about the most humiliating…
Zoo trades away most popular animals; working towards ‘competitive window’ in 2024
TORONTO – After suffering for years in comparison to other world-class zoos like the San Diego Zoo and Bronx Zoo, the Toronto Zoo has decided to intentionally send its best animals to other…
Toronto Landlord just needs you to put a 20% down payment on the building before you sign a lease
TORONTO — Sources have confirmed that the landlord currently showing you around a 1-bedroom apartment in a Toronto low-rise just needs you to put a 20% down payment on the mid-century building it…
Doug Ford demands officer who carded Masai Ujiri be allowed to march in Raptors parade
TORONTO – Once again standing up for the rights of police officers everywhere, Ontario Premier Doug Ford demanded today that the unnamed officer who reportedly stopped and shoved team manag…
Most affordable apartments in Toronto revealed to be bathroom stalls in club
TORONTO – A young professional in Toronto was astonished to learn that the city’s most affordable apartments are actually located in the bathroom stalls of a club, whose name and location remains…
Doug Ford announces new Toronto subway lines, cancels them before end of conference
TORONTO — Speaking to reporters, Ontario premier Doug Ford cancelled the city’s plans for a downtown relief subway line before announcing his own “Ontario Line” subway, which he also then p…
Last person to use Toronto’s Union Station pre-construction dies of old age
TORONTO – Florence Green, the last person in the world to travel through Toronto’s Union Station before the renovation began, has died peacefully in her sleep at the age of 112. “Our belove…
