Editorial by Kathleen Wynne The votes have been counted, and you don’t want me in office anymore. I get it. And you know what? Good. You want Doug Ford in office? Well, good luck with that, assho…
Opinion
I’m pretty sure that crossing guard thinks I’m a kid
By: David Hester, 33. Does that crossing guard think I’m a kid? We definitely made eye contact when I was waiting for the walk signal at an intersection I would describe as “not worthy of concern…
I just really, really like smiles
By: Doug Ford You may have noticed I found myself embroiled in a bit of a scandal this weekend. No not the one where I suggested immigrants are not real Ontarians. The other one where I repeatedl…
Editorial: The feminist merchandise—I mean future—I want my daughter to have
By: Diane Momford As a mom and feminist, I know how important it is to set an example for my beautiful daughter, especially in these tumultuous times. That’s why I make a point of sitting down wi…
My mom is the strongest woman I know besides Gargantua The Mighty
It wasn’t until I became an adult that I appreciated my mother. Growing up, there were many times I wished she would lighten up and not be so strict with me and my siblings. But that was before I…
Local man excited to regurgitate opinion he saw on Reddit
NEWMARKET, ON – After spending hours scrolling in order to reaffirm his world-view, local man James Reed is delightfully excited to regurgitate an opinion he saw on Reddit. At press time, Reed ma…
OPINION – If this is what you get in a continental breakfast, I’d hate to see a regional breakfast
Let me get this straight: I take a break from sleazy fleabag motels to splurge at a joint with free continental breakfast. Then I wake up at the crack of dawn to partake, and you come at me with …
Stop acting like you haven’t also used Facebook to spy on people
EDITORIAL by Mark Zuckerberg Look, I’m still taking a lot of heat for the way Facebook collected data that may or may not have been used to spy on its users. Do I deserve to shoulder some blame f…
I’m gonna get that hand
Editorial by President Donald Trump This is an open letter to my wife, Melania Trump. You’ve left me with no other option, since I don’t know where you are in the house and I think you have me mu…
Marrying your cousin was quite common back then vs For the last time, Harold, I’m not interested – we’re cousins
Point: Marrying your cousin was quite common back then By: Harold Taber While may be taboo nowadays to be in an intimate relationship with your cousin, I can tell you that it was very common back…
