NEW YORK CITY / BOULDER, CO – In an unprecedented publishing goof, both Fortune magazine and Ski Magazine have independently published a list of Top 50 moguls featuring a variety of mogul t…
Dumb Week
As porch thefts increase, police advise homeowners to start bringing in their porches at night
CALGARY – Police are telling homeowners that the best way to avoid the increasingly common phenomenon of porch theft is to remove the temptation and bring their porches inside rather than l…
EDITORIAL: Sex with no strings attached is killing my marionette fetish
BY: Simon Bradshaw I’ve turned a blind eye at premarital sex, friends with benefits, and open relationships, but there comes a point when these new fads cross a boundary. I may be an old fogey, b…
Disgusting! Doctors performed surgery on this man and discovered his body was full of blood!
REGINA – In a story so unbelievable, it has to be true, doctors out in Regina, Saskatchewan opened up a patient’s abdomen as part of an appendix operation and made a totally gross discovery. It w…
Kinky anarchist enjoys autocratic asphyxiation
LETHBRIDGE, AB – Admitting he’s addicted to the rush he gets from choking members of the fascist capitalist elite, a self-described anarchist says his greatest sexual kink is autocratic asp…
Police stopping more drivers for random roadside jesting
TIMMINS, ON – A record number of motorists across the country have been pulled over by police for mandatory roadside jesting. A recent report has shown that since new jesting laws were pass…
Bryan Adams releases remastered version of “Summer of ’69” where he giggles every time he says “69”
LOS ANGELES – In celebration of Canadian rock singer Bryan Adams’ most beloved hit, Universal Records announced today that they will be releasing a remastered “honest” ver…
Raffi sinks millions into failed BananaPhone
Victoria BC – After ten years of research and development, acclaimed singer-songwriter, Raffi Cavoukian admits that he has been unable to produce a functioning smart device known only as the ‘Ban…
Google Maps error sends local couple to howling void
HOWLING VOID – Charlaine and Zach Cooper are livid after an error in their Google Maps app caused them to drive straight into the howling void. “You hear about Google accidentally sending p…
Senate refuses to pass bill removing all references to Bigfoot from “O Canada”
OTTAWA – The Senate continues to refuse to pass a House bill that would remove all references to the simian cryptid known as Bigfoot from Canada’s national anthem. “I’m tired of the PC poli…
