Toronto, Ontario (Probably) – The Juno Awards happened last weekend and we swear we were totally going to watch it but we didn’t, so here’s a roundup of what probably happened! So first, Ju…
Entertainment
Studies confirm watching an in-flight movie from four rows behind makes it 10x better
VANCOUVER, BC — Researchers at University of British Columbia have confirmed the theory that watching an in-flight movie from four rows behind makes it 10x better. “It’s an age-old question that …
Netflix cracks down on password sharing to help users let go of their ex
LOS GATOS, CALIFORNIA – The online streaming service Netflix has announced their intention to discourage different people from making use of the same account in an effort to get users to fi…
Mom calls in excited panic just to say current Jeopardy champion is Canadian
HALIFAX, NS – Earlier this week, Eleanor Weaver, 23, got a panicked call from her mother around 10pm just to say that the current Jeopardy champion, Mattea Roach, is Canadian. “I thought so…
Gilbert Gottfried joins Bob Saget and Norm MacDonald for Comedy Central Roast of God
HEAVEN – With news breaking that Gilbert Gottfried has passed away, Heaven has announced the beloved comedian has joined his departed friends Bob Saget and Norm MacDonald in the Comedy Cent…
Review: Season two of Bridgerton needed more boinking
Burlington, ON – Season two of Bridgerton is out and the reviews are in: there’s not enough nudity and not nearly enough sex. Instead, all viewers got was a stupid story about sacrifice and love …
Feel old yet? All the puppets from Mr. Dressup are now dead
It’s the end of an era in Canadian media – the final puppet from beloved children’s program Mr. Dressup has just passed away. Annie, the granddaughter of co-star Granny, died early th…
Cancel culture run rampant: Louis C.K. forced to win a mere Grammy
LAS VEGAS – Louis C.K. has won the Grammy Award for Best Comedy Album, proving once again that cancel culture is out of control in the western world. “If we, as a society, were serious about reh…
Touching: This Hollywood movie defies the stereotypes that Hollywood helped set
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Walt Disney Pictures has announced their latest project, The Bear Minimum, an animated coming-of-age movie that breaks the stereotypes they spent years reinforcing because i…
Oscars pledge to have more diversity in styles of fighting at next year’s ceremony
Los Angeles, CA – After receiving heavy criticism for a lack of diversity at this year’s ceremonies, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has pledged to include a larger variety …
