SANTA CLARA, CA – Team USA is triumphantly announcing their third gold medal since the start of the Milano-Cortina Winter Olympics, in the much-watched Super Bowl event. “No other cou…
Blue Jays, Dodgers cause mass confusion by dressing up as each other for Halloween world series game
TORONTO – The Toronto Blue Jays and Los Angeles Dodgers caused mass confusion across North America today as they each dressed up as the other team for today’s World Series game that coincid…
Nobel Prize in Medicine awarded to hospital administrators for breakthroughs in surliness
OSLO – Today the Nobel committee announced that they have awarded this year’s prize in Physiology or Medicine to everyone who works as an administrator in a hospital for breakthroughs in su…
Landlord claims space under porch counts as second bedroom
35 Minutes Away From Where You’d Ideally Like To Live – Frank Moriarty, the landlord of the apartment you took the afternoon off from work to view, told you today that the space under the f…
Pedestrian walking in road because cyclist riding on sidewalk because car parked in bike lane
TORONTO – Eyewitnesses today confirmed reports that a pedestrian was walking in the road because a cyclist was riding on the sidewalk because a car was parked in the bike lane. “I was drivi…
Bruce Fanjoy wins Battle River-Crowfoot by-election
CAMROSE, AB – In yet another shocking electoral upset, Conservative leader and former Member of Parliament Pierre Poilievre has somehow been defeated once again in today’s by-election…
Newly discovered Shakespeare folio reveals lost play ‘Dracula vs. Frankenstein’
Stratford, England – Shakespeare Birthplace Trust archivists today announced their discovery of a lost Shakespeare folio for a play entitled “Dracula vs. Frankenstein.” Natasha Cartwright, …
Poilievre can’t believe he hung out with Jordan Peterson for nothing
OTTAWA – Former member of Parliament Pierre Poilievre today bemoaned the interview he gave to Jordan Peterson, saying he can’t believe he hung out with him for a whole afternoon only to hav…
