HOLLYWOOD, CA – Mourners worldwide are gathering to fondly remember a time when the internet was primarily used to share humorous memes about action star Chuck Norris, who also died today at age 86.
Bereaved online users shared an outpouring of nostalgia for a time before the internet was a non-stop avalanche of anxiety-inducing, algorithmically-driven horror, epitomized by widely-shared jokes about the impossible physical prowess of the late star of Walker Texas Ranger.
“Hearing that he died, it doesn’t make me think about him, so much as the Fall of 2005 when I was entering undergrad at McGill and adding ‘Chuck Norris Facts’ to my Myspace page,” explains account systems supervisor Mark Whebby, 38. “Back then the internet was a fun place with jokes like ‘Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a coal mine and turned it into a diamond mine’, whereas now it’s just AI revenge porn deepfakes and overt white nationalism.”
At press time Whebby was attempting to pay tribute to the late actor by finding a list of Chuck Norris jokes, but only finding links to various prediction market apps.
