Washington, DC – In breaking news, showrunners for the year 2026 have been caught quietly reusing large portions of 2025’s scripts, prompting renewed concern that the coming season will once again feature the same chaos.
The discovery was made after several attentive viewers noticed entire scenes from early January that appeared to be lifted directly from last year, with only the dates, hashtags, and levels of despair updated.
“We’re not reusing scripts,” said Cedrick Gibbs, a spokesperson for 2026. “We’re recontextualizing them. It’s a very intentional callback to a year audiences already found notable, if deeply upsetting.”
According to leaked internal documents, the 2026 writers’ room has opted to preserve most of 2025’s narrative structure, citing “strong brand recognition” and “the public’s demonstrated inability to handle anything new.”
“The reality is people are watching,” Gibbs added. “Hate-watching is still watching. There’s no such thing as bad press.”
Showrunners insist 2026 will feel “fresh enough,” citing that civil war is technically new. According to insiders, however, upcoming storylines reportedly include the same shit, including political chaos, rising prices, deadly climate disasters, and tech billionaire drama.
Reaction from audiences has been mixed, if “mixed” means a collective sigh audible from low-Earth orbit.
“I guess there’s comfort in the consistency,” said local viewer Patricia Hammond, 34, who did not say she was depressed, despite all available evidence. “It’s like my marriage, starting over sounds worse than just accepting misery.”
Network executives confirmed they briefly considered hiring new writers for 2026 before abandoning the idea entirely.
“We explored bringing in fresh voices,” said executive Douglas Pemberton. “But new writers require new ideas. New ideas require change. Change requires effort. Effort requires energy. Energy requires hope. And hope is not currently in the budget. We could probably swing the return of a dead character next season, but not hope.”
When asked whether the writing team had a message for audiences heading into the new season, lead showrunner Martin Chen was blunt.
“Same time, same channel, same everything,” Chen said. “See you in hell. By which we mean 2026, 2027 and most of 2028. But also, we do mean hell.”
