SAINT-MICHEL, QC – A recent forensic examination of Cirque du Soleil’s latest show has brought to light shocking allegations: that the troupe’s show is not exactly the same every time, even though no one has ever felt the need to see it more than once.
“Cirque du Soleil’s new performance Fissss, is a visual marvel that explores the magic of everyday life from the perspective of a mute child narrator with an underwater theme. This is a marked departure from their previous show WHHHHA!, which explored the magic of everyday life from the perspective of a mute child narrator with an up-in-the-sky theme,” states a review in the Montreal Gazette.
“It changes the game in a bold way. Instead of jugglers, clowns, contortionists, and a surprise audience plant, they have jugglers, clowns, contortionists, a surprise audience plant, and the music of Michael Jackson.”
Previous attendees have always suspected the acclaimed circus has dabbled in new artistic expression, despite the fact that the original show 40 years ago was a crowd pleaser. “I saw them in 2013, 2017, and 2023, and I suspected they might be changing it up,” reports Liza Jamison of Halifax, who actually saw the shows in 2012, 2019, and 2003.
“I told my husband that they didn’t just change up the animals because it was laundry day! My Cirque Du Soleil Extended Universe Theory is still possible!”
When questioned about why they felt the need to enact changes, creative guide Michel Laprise implied further alterations might be needed.
“Honestly, we are just wondering what we have to do to get people to grasp the subtext about Quebec separatism at this point,” Laprise sighed. “Oh well. As long as a vacant parking lot by the water gets filled by our tent, we’ve done our job.”
This might be the most shocking revelation in the live performance scene since the bombshell report that suggests there are more than 3 members of the Blue Man Group at any given time.
