Beaconsfield, QC – A generic store brand prescription medication, Padrazole, is making waves at a local house party after college rugby player, Luke Auden found out the stomach ulcer treating medicine he’s currently taking is totally chill to consume with alcohol.
“Are you serious? Let’s fucking gooooooooo!” said Luke after googling the medicine’s mixing effects with alcohol. Luke then immediately started shotgunning a Twisted Tea.
“I have a stomach ulcer, so I thought there was no way I could be drinking tonight,” sure enough, a quick Google search, encouraged by his friend Matt, revealed Padrazole, also known as C17H12F2N3O4S can combine with C₂H₆O (alcohol) to create nothing but good times.
“Contrary to popular belief, medicine can be really chill sometimes,” said Rugby teammate, Matt Chester, who has had a similar experience with Bendoziaphene last year. “I know it’s all nerds and shit that come up with this stuff but sometimes they really pull through for the boys.”
Luke says he’s just sorry he didn’t find out earlier, adding, “I feel like the world of medicine needs to prioritize making all medication mixable with alcohol. There are just too many people out there, unable to party as hard as they would like to because of the meds they’re taking.”
Luke wants to spread awareness about medicines that can be mixed with alcohol and calls for the re-engineering of medicines that can’t. “Even popular over-the-counter pills like Tylenol and Benadryl have harmful interactions with alcohol. I mean really? In 2023? That needs to change.” shouted Luke, to the uproarious cheering of fellow partygoers.
“I can’t believe no one else is saying this stuff. It’s a no brainer,” said Brad Buxton, hockey player and longtime friend to Luke and Matt. “Back in the day, alcohol WAS medicine. People used to drink rum if they had the flu or anxiety,” continued Brad. “We need to get back on that. I’m pretty sure hard seltzer cured my toenail fungus.”
The boys took their idea to Alex Lusaz, a first year pre-med student at McGill university, who also happened to be at the party. “I think it’s a great idea,” shouted Alex over blaring dance music. “As a student I love drinking, and as a medical student, I love medicine. Let’s fucking do this. Chiller medicine for all!”
