QUEBEC – After a unanimous decision in the Quebec legislature on Wednesday, the provincial government motioned that all emojis remove hijabs for Quebec representation.
“Other nations that aren’t separate countries have their flags, like Scotland,” a spokesperson announced after the decision. “So it’s about time all hijabs were removed from people’s mobile devices, as it does not represent Quebec values.”
The non-binding motion is aimed at the Unicode consortium, which regulates the standards for exchange of text data, asking denunciations of “religious symbols” to be entered into phones globally.
“This is a pressing issue,” the spokesperson continued. “Users have been unable to communicate Quebec secularism for too long. Once we remove all hijabs, burqas, and turbans, everyone will know it was the province with the big cross on the flag.”
Die-hard supporters of the motion stated that the next step in recognizing Quebec as a nation will be to uncircumcise every eggplant emoji.