CALGARY – Earlier today Kaitlyn Crandell was seen nodding encouragingly at a story she completely missed.
“It really seemed like Kaitlyn enjoyed my anecdote. She was nodding so fervently” stated the storyteller, Brian Greene, who was pleased with how it was received.
According to reports, Crandell failed to hear all of the beginning, and 90% of the middle and end. Crandell has since been racking her brain to put the pieces she managed to hear into a logical narrative. The task is proving difficult as the only three words she caught were, “Niagara,” “Cumberbatch,” and “Salmonella”.
Witnesses at the scene noted that Crandell nodded with a fervour that signalled both an understanding and an appreciation of the story that was being told. The reality could not be further from her outward appearance. Crandell had no idea how Niagara, Cumberbatch, and Salmonella fit together.
“I assume that Benedict Cumberbatch got a bad cad case of Salmonella at a Niagara Falls restaurant but I’m really grasping at straws” stated Crandell when pressed for details.
To supplement her nodding, Crandell raised an eyebrow and said, “Oh wow” when Greene paused to take a breath. At his next pause she claimed she had, “heard something similar on a podcast” and managed to fill the remaining intervals with the appropriate “oh’s” and “uh huh’s” despite having zero idea of what was being said.
Reportedly, Greene completely bought Crandell’s comments and gestures of recognition.
“I was a little surprised that Kaitlyn liked my story” stated Greene. “Normally she’s offended by my racist jokes.”
