COBWEB CREEK, AB – Early reports are surfacing that after exploring the creepy abandoned house overlooking Cobweb Creek, a terrified man has come running down the driveway, claiming to have seen what, at press time, has only been described as a “g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g”.
While the terrified witness of the as-yet-unknown event or thing has still not provided any additional information or syllables in regards to what it is he had actually seen, he does seem to be trying to accentuate his point by raising his arms menacingly over his head, and pointing back in the direction of the house. Every attempt to interrupt him or prompt him to continue, however, only seems to result in him starting over at the beginning: “a, a g-g-g-g-g-g-g”.
“Given the broad range of local rumours and superstitions about the abandoned house, it’s possible this man believes he’s seen anything from a goblin to a gremlin, or maybe a golem,” explained Constable Ken Rossi, the first officer on the still-ambiguous scene. “Although he also could have just seen a garbage pile or a gross carpet. The house is in bad shape. But at this point he’s still just going ‘g-g-g-g’ so the jury’s still out. I have no idea what to call in.”
Authorities say they’ve already been in contact with the man’s girlfriend, grandparents, gardener and most of his golf buddies, in an attempt to narrow down the extensive list of possible things or people he may have seen, but have confirmed that they were not in the house.
Attempts have been made to glean additional information from the man’s dog, but his companion has proved similarly cowardly, resorting solely to pointing, chattering its teeth and covering its eyes.
Updates will follow as new information on this story comes to light.
