WINNIPEG – Lives were changed at the Portage Place Shopping Centre this morning as a smug and condescending look from local woman Lydia Nost convinced up-til-then neglectful father Jason Moreau to immediately become a caring and more attentive father.
“I was shopping for boots when I saw him standing in front of the Winners on his phone, while his baby was screaming and crying,” said Nost, 28 and childless. “Obviously I knew the only solution to this crisis was to walk by, clear my throat and shake my head in a disapproving fashion.”
“This is actually the 12th child whose life I have radically improved through this technique,” Nost added.
Witnesses to what is now being referred to as The Event say that as soon as Nost passed, Moreau immediately put his phone away and began comforting his child, who stopped crying right away and did that cute laughing thing babies do on YouTube.
For his part Moreau said he just wanted to express his gratitude to the woman who “changed his life.”
“I guess I’ve been a bit distracted lately, what with losing my job and everything. But as soon as I saw that angry look from a woman who didn’t know a single thing about me or my child, I realized I needed to change everything.”
Moreau revealed that not long afterwards, his baby had said her first words: “Thank You Lydia.”
Shortly after leaving the mall Nost’s campaign for societal change only continued after she convinced a homeless man to quit drinking by giving him money on the condition he buy food with it.
