TORONTO – New Democratic Party leader, Thomas Mulcair, visited Fan Expo today in Toronto, ingratiating himself to thousands of science fiction, fantasy, horror, anime, video game and comic book franchise fanatics by showing off his body, covered in Game of Thrones tattoos.
“House Stark is close to my heart… Literally!” said Mulcair opening his suit jacket and shirt, brandishing an ink representation the Direwolf sigil belonging to the once ruling Stark family of Winterfell on his chest.
“Ned Stark’s principled approach to politics, and his willingness to sacrifice himself to do what’s right, is why he’s my favourite character, even though my beard is way better.”
Mulcair’s state of undress progressed when he displayed the entire map of Westeros, the world in which the franchise takes place, tattooed on his back, explaining that the greying hair of his neck line represented what was, “north of the Wall.”
Mulcair rallied the audience by creating parallels from the Game of Thrones universe to Canadian politics.
“As you stare into Mr. Harper’s cold, blue eyes, it’s obvious to every Canadian that he is our land’s version of the Night’s King, leader of the undead White Walkers,” he said, referring to the race, age and shambling gait of the majority of Harper’s members of Parliament.
“And with our economy in a recession, if we re-elect Mr. Harper, make no mistake, Winter is Coming.”
Some fans in attendance, many of whom were in costume for the occasion, were enthralled by Mr. Mulcair’s appearance.
“Now that I know [Mulcair] is a Game of Thrones fan like me, I believe in Tom all the way. He’s Canada’s Azor Ahai,” said Tiffany Bentham of Toronto, who was cosplaying as genderswap Jack Layton.
“Tom’s so badass you might as well call the NDP the New Dothraki Party… except without all the horses and taking of women… New Dornish Party, maybe? You know what, forget I said anything.”
While others remained skeptical.
“Let’s be honest, the NDP are the exact opposite of the Lannisters, they never pay their debts. I mean, who would he have as his Master of Coin, Peggy Nash? C’mon!” said Nicolas Mozza of Woodbridge, dressed as zombie Jim Flaherty.
When asked about his feelings on the NDP and the Liberal parties forming a coalition government, Mulcair only promised that it if it were to happen, it would be a, “real Red Wedding for the Liberals.”
Other tattoos the NDP leader exhibited include a portrait of Daenerys Targaryen on his left arm with the words “Mother of Dragons” underneath, the face the embattled brothers The Hound on his right fist and The Mountain on his left, a picture of Jon Snow and Egret kissing with the words “You know nothing, Jon Snow” on his buttocks, and finally a tramp stamp on the small of his back of the words “Valar Morghulis”.
Also making appearances at Fan Expo were Liberal leader Justin Trudeau, seen cosplaying as a Tuxedo Mask from Sailor Moon, embattled Senator Mike Duffy as the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters, and Prime Minister Stephen Harper who, while dressed as himself, was constantly mistaken for a Cylon from Battlestar Galactica.
