OTTAWA – Citizenship Minister Chris Alexander has declared all women wearing Lululemon pants will be prohibited from taking their citizenship oath stating that the pants clearly cover up the true physique of a woman.
“Women will no longer be hiding under the veil of nylon,” Alexander thundered during Question Period. “It’s offensive that women feel obliged to make their butts appear more toned than they actually are when they’re joining the Canadian family. They should stand for our values, our way of life and our way of wearing pants!”
Alexander also went onto attack how women should not be forced to wear overpriced, over-hyped yoga pants that only come in certain sizes.
“In Canada, we don’t see women between sizes 2-12 worth $120; we see women for who they look like,” added Alexander generating a loud standing ovation from Tory backbenchers.
In addition to the ban, new citizens taking the oath will now be required to wear plaid, hockey jersey or seal skin in order to obtain citizenship.
