Last week, the Supreme Court of Canada ruled that physician assisted suicide can be legal in specific cases. Here are some reasons in which you cannot elect to end your life early.
1. As a cure for hangovers
2. When your internet connection is temporarily down
3. To help your music career
4. To get out of the Catholic Church
5. Accidentally tossing frisbee into neighbour’s yard
6. Being a Leafs fan
7. Because you believe it’s the best choice in the upcoming federal election
8. After yet another embarrassing autocorrect
9. To prove your creepy love for someone
10. To save you from having to spend time with your family
11. When you’ve just had enough of fucking winter
12. When Jeff in your office starts talking
