At a recent Ontario Bar Association Event, Justice Minister and renowned expert on women Peter MacKay explained the dangers of having a female judge make a ruling during her period.
“I feel like it would be dangerous to have a woman deliver rulings during her moon blood time,” MacKay said after he commented on how women have a closer bond with children and therefore are less likely to become judges. “These rulings would be hysterical and mind-boggling. It’s a well established fact that women are more emotional creatures and therefore not trustworthy during this time of the month.”
The Justice Minister then pulled out a diagram titled “Parts of a Lady” from 1921 and began to explain the various moods women experience during their menstrual cycle.
“Look, I don’t want to whip you girls into some sort of hysterical frenzy with my comments,” MacKay cautioned to audience members that included women lawyers and Supreme Court Justice Rosalie Abella. “Having said that, it’s been scientifically proven that pregnancy and childbirth shrink your little woman brains. If you were a man on trial for sexual assault, would you want a woman judge with a smaller brain? I think not!”
MacKay wrapped up his remarks with medical discussion of the root causes of wandering womb syndrome, which he reminded women audience members can easily be cured by marriage.
At press time, he phoned his female relatives to make sure they hadn’t left the kitchen.