VANCOUVER- After his remarks that his government didn’t have a responsibility to care for poor children drew strong rebukes from nearly all living humans, Industry Minister James Moore was left with nothing to eat but his own words on Monday.
“Today, all I have to eat are my words” Moore said at a press conference in Vancouver. “I feel sorrow and guilt at being caught in a moment of honesty but mainly I feel hungry because I haven’t eaten anything else today.”
Moore claims the experience has given him a newfound appreciation for the plight of impoverished children.
“When the controversy first broke, I followed my training and tweeted that I had been misquoted and called the story ridiculous,” the minister explained as he searched for a vending machine. “Then a recording of the interview was posted online and I was all out of options, eating I had no option other than apologizing.”
“I now understand how famished the 153,000 poor children in BC who have nothing to eat but the words of politicians’ promises must feel. They didn’t want to eat words and I sure as hell didn’t want to eat mine.”
At press time, Moore was begging members of the press corps for the crumbs at the bottom of their chip bags.
