MANCHESTER, N.H. – Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney announced he is divorcing his wife of 40 years to marry a corporation with whom he has had a love affair over the last seven months.
“She’s beautiful and we have so much in common,” Romney told reporters at a public press conference. “And her dowry, ooh baby her dowry…”
Romney said he decided to come clean about his love affair with the Fortune 500 company Marathon Oil because he has never felt such an emotional bond with anyone, except for three years ago when he made out with the Walmart head-office building but never heard back from her.
