TORONTO – Local couple Tina and William were able to spend their evening watching a live recording of the new Beaverton TV show, the very important televised adaptation of the very importan…
Tag: Television
Mansbridge retirement leaves nation’s mothers with precious few remaining sexual fantasies
TORONTO – Peter Mansbridge’s announcement that he will be retiring in July 2017 have left the middle-aged mothers of Canada with even fewer celebrities about which to sexually fantasize. “H…
Top 10 Heritage Minutes to make love to
Take a look at the hottest Heritage Minutes that you didn’t even know would kickstart your love life. 10. Agnes Macphail Get tied up and spanked as the first female MP, Agnes Macphail chast…
Which dead ‘The Littlest Hobo’ dog are you?
Ever wondered which of the now deceased The Littlest Hobo dogs is your true spirit animal? We all have, but now you can take this quiz to find out! Sources https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dog_TV ht…
Marriage on the rocks after argument over whether Golden Age of television has ended
HAMILTON – A recent argument between Ted and Susan Jameson over whether the golden age of television has indeed come to a close has led to concerns that their marriage may be in jeopardy. “Sure, …
Canadians banned from Wheel of Fortune for calling the letter ‘Zed’
LOS ANGELES – Sony Productions has announced that Canadians will no longer be allowed on long-running American game show Wheel of Fortune due to irreconcilable cultural differences regardin…
Bald eagle wins America’s Got Talons for ninth straight season
NEW YORK – In a completely unsurprising development, Iggy, a 10-year-old bald eagle from a mangrove swamp in Florida, has once again emerged triumphant in the latest season of America’s Got…
Elaborate conspiracy to underpay Gillian Anderson for X-Files reboot revealed to be just ordinary sexism
HOLLYWOOD – Following revelations that Fox attempted to pay X-Files star Gillian Anderson half the salary of her male co-star, what many had assumed to be a shadowy conspiracy stretching to…
Nation’s left-alone dogs floored by latest episode of Murdoch Mysteries
NATIONWIDE – After a hair-raising episode that placed Murdoch, Ogden, and the whole gang in personal danger, the nation’s dogs that have been left alone with the TV on so that they don’t ge…
George R. R. Martin threatens to kill himself off in next Thrones book
SANTA FE — After Game of Thrones fans responded with outrage to his announcement that he will be unable to deliver another novel before the premiere of the franchise’s next TV season, autho…