LONDON, ON – In an explosively damning report published by the University of Western Ontario, researchers found that the temperature outside “never right.” Though the report was expected to…
Tag: hot
Woman dies from third degree burns after finding perfect shower temperature
EDMONTON – In a tragic domestic incident yesterday, 30-year-old Mandy Whitehouse died from horrific burns covering almost her entire body, after finally finding a shower temperature that was warm…
Man suffering heat stroke told not to complain about the heat because it often snows in January
TORONTO – Local man Kevin Meyer, debilitated by the effects of high temperatures, has been repeatedly told by friends and family not to complain about the heat because several months from n…
Television cast too attractive
LOS ANGELES – In a wanton disregard for verisimilitude, casting directors announced the leading cast for an upcoming medical drama on Friday, which, according to sources, will feature actor…
Hot sibling placed at front in Christmas card photo
MONTREAL – For the sixteenth year in a row, flaxen haired, blue eyed Christine Wiley, 24, has been placed in front of lanky brother Jack Wiley, 17, and her brunette sister Lindsay Wiley, 28…
Woman with rare genetic disorder can only regulate her body temperature by complaining about the heat
VANCOUVER – As temperatures continue to remain high over large sections of Canada, Vancouverite Cheryl McCloud is keeping cool the only way she can: complaining. “It’s not that I enjoy comp…
Low-grade depression is summer’s hottest accessory
NEW YORK- Style forecasters and trendsetters alike are thrilled to announce low grade depression is the trend of the summer. Hot off cubicles of that 9-to-5 desk job that you took just for the wi…
Controversy erupts after retailer unveils line of sexy Handmaid’s Tale Halloween costumes
SHENZHEN, CHINA – An online retailer finds itself in hot water after unveiling its line of ‘sexy’ Handmaid’s Tale Halloween costumes. The outfit, consisting of a skimpy re…